In my years as a person, and especially a girl, I have fallen guilty to judging others. My mother has always taught me that you don’t have to like everyone, but you also don’t have to show that you don’t like them. Meaning there is no need to express your dislike in any form. Which, is where my biggest learning years come in. In grades 4-8, I learned many things about girl drama and gossip. First of all gossip will come back to bite you in the butt. In short, if you say something about someone make sure you can say it to their face. This is when I learned that I needed to keep my trap shut about things I found annoying about my then best friend.
Which brings me to my relationship with my then best friend. So, this girl I have known for what is now going on 16 years. She was my best friend, we had ups and downs, big astronomical fights, but I never once hated her, I never once lost my love for her. It was weird because after grade 9 we lost touch, we were civil and admittedly I don’t forget the things that annoyed me to death about her. But I do remember the years the two of us were bullied to the point of not wanting to go school, all because we were judged for hanging out together and having loads of fun while other girls were doing God’s knows what with their free saturdays. But, when I got into high school these childhood bullies stopped bullying me, but I never forget that they judged me for who I hung out with. I am still judged for who I hang out with, who I am nice too, who I laugh with in public. The truth is I can see why all the “popular” girls I skated with thought I was weird, I didn’t hang out with the “popular” group even though I easily could have. Which brings me to the idea of those who judged me. I feel bad for people who judge a person on their personality based on who they associate with, because, as cliche as it is, it is THEIR problem what they think not yours. When I do things by myself or with kind of “unique people” I try not to care what people think of me. In university I found that no one cares, people will judge you, but it is what you do with your perception of the judgers that creates your perspective of yourself. Plus, if your friends with someone who judges others harshly you may wonder what they think you, but the kind of judging I am not taking about is “oh my god that girl needs a bra” (this is not harsh judging, just the truth), it is the negative connotations where people bully and knowingly ignore people just because of their judgement of you not because they actually know you. A piece of advice, judging is part of human wiring, we all naturally judge people, it is what you do with your judgement that shapes your character, so if you want to ruin someones life, go ahead. However, in most cases it is best to just keep your negative judgements to yourself.